You don't know what it's like until you've lived it.

It's taken me 12 hours to be semi-coherent about this.

I am 39 years old. From the time I was aware of them, I've been a Red Sox fan. My first clear memory is of them blowing an August lead in 1974. '75 was a mixed blessing. Then came 1978.

I was 13 in 1978--the true 'formative years' when it comes to learning about the world. In addition to all the normal pubescent discoveries, I also learned that the Red Sox will manage to lose in the most horrible ways imaginable. 8 years later, in 1986, that was reinforced. At least I was 21 that year and was able to drink heavily.

You get used to it, but you never accept it. And it's compounded by the fact that your main rivals are the Yankees. Look, Yankees fans--let's face it, you're obnoxious. Not all of you, but enough. The reason you're obnoxious is that you think championships are your birthright, an entitlement. You're the sorest winners in all of sports. You gloat. It's irritating as hell.

The problem is, Yankees fans have had a reason to gloat. I'm sure a Yankees fan couldn't imagine losing a series in a draining, heartbreaking way--because it so rarely happens. The Yankees get beat occasionally, but they never get crushed. And a Red Sox fan can't imagine winning a series like that.

Until last night.

You don't understand. My brother called me from California when it was 8 to 1 and his first words to me were, "Is this really happening?" I woke up three times last night and had to clear my head to make sure I hadn't dreamed it. If you're a Red Sox fan this morning, you're stunned. Completely, utterly stunned.

And euphoric in a way that you've hardly ever been before. For me, only the births of my daughters compares. The Red Sox beat the Yankees for the pennant and did it by making history. And by getting the breaks. And by getting the clutch performances. THESE THINGS JUST DON'T HAPPEN!!!

It's not over, and if you believe in silly 'curses' it isn't broken. The curse has to do with the World Series, and we haven't won that yet. Bad things could happen. The Sox pitching staff is being held together by spit and duct tape (and sutures in Curt Schilling's ankle) at this point. Both the Cardinals and Astros are excellent teams. This could be the prelude for another disappointment.

But for once, for once, Yankees fans know what it's like. I've been waiting 39 years for that. And, for once, Red Sox fans will watch the World Series--and, though we know bad things could happen, we won't be expecting them. Because good things can happen, too. Even to the Red Sox. Finally.

For once, I feel good about my karma. And then there's this: the seventh game of the World Series will be October 31st. The election is November 2nd. There's a day in between those two days, November 1st. It's a significant day for me personally. My best friend died on that date 25 years ago. She was 15. She had leukemia.

I would very much like that awful day to be bookended by a Sox championship and a Kerry victory. And, for once, I'm hopeful.

Finally.